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Bum Reviews

Bum

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104
Running Time
Two to Five minutes.
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"Oh my God! This is the greatest movie I've ever seen in my life!" -- Chester A. Bum.

Chester A. Bum is a character created by Walker to review current and new film releases (usually the film opening with the widest release that weekend).

Chester often starts off every review stating that said film is "the greatest movie I've ever seen in my life!" Throughout the review, he questions many aspects in the film and even compares them to himself or the many narcotics (drugs) he has taken. In many cases, Chester will also talk a little bit about his past. He typically ends every review with his final verdict and a plea for some change in his Styrofoam cup.

The only four reviews (as of April 12, 2012) to depart from the format are the Bum's review of The Dark Knight (in which Chester is left almost speechless), Citizen Kane (which Chester gives a negative review), Wreck-It Ralph (in which he is depressed in the first half of the review, but slowly becomes happy by the end), and The Avengers (where Doug temporarily breaks character to emphasize that the movie really is so good that the words "greatest movie I've ever seen in my life" may well be deserved).

Walker's actual opinion of the film is presented in the end card (e.g. "Seriously though, Indiana Jones was okay."). His first review of Speed Racer was on May 11th 2008 and has since reviewed at least each weekly new release. Chester has made cameos on episodes 5 and 6 of Ask That Guy With the Glasses, and also during The Nostalgia Critic's Follow That Bird, : Annihilation, SNICK and End of Days reviews. Chester also appeared in the promo for the February 2009 Live Donation Drive and Doug got into character during the Drive itself. On April Fools Day 2009, Chester took the place of The Nostalgia Critic to review The Neverending Story. By the Thor review (released on May 8th, 2011), Walker would start to do follow-up videos as himself, stating his personal opinions, until the release of his latest review show Sibling Rivalry, which features his brother Rob Walker. The full list of Bum Reviews can be seen here.

Note: The episode summaries below, just like the show, contain spoilers. Lots of 'em.

Episodes

2008

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
1 Speed Racer (2008) 03:39 The first ever Bum Review! HOORAY! At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Speed Racer sucked." May 11, 2008
2 The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (2008) 03:16 Random comedy ensues as he tries to make sense of that movie. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Narnia kicked ass!" May 17, 2008
3 Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) 03:44 Figures that the movie was about Scientology after realizing the other <a class="inlineAdmedialink" href="#">movies</a> were about other religions. Later, he realized he must of been high seeing the movie. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Indiana Jones was just okay." May 25, 2008
4 Where's the Bum? 00:53 The Bum explains that new videos were going to be on Xomba.com. That deal didn't last that long. June 2, 2008
5 Sex and the City: The Movie (2008) 02:59 He's convinced watching the movie would turn guys into women! "It's like Estrogen the Movie!" Somehow he walked out with a purse and high heeled <a class="inlineAdmedialink" href="#">shoes</a>. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, men, bring your iPods." June 6, 2008
6 Kung-Fu Panda (2008) 02:41 Convinced the panda's from the Panda Express restaurants. Says all great movies have monkeys! At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Kung Fu Panda was actually pretty good." June 14, 2008
7 The Incredible Hulk (2008) 03:07 Believes the first Hulk movie was a crack fantasy. With the appearance of Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark, he is convinced Marvel is putting together a baseball team. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, The Incredible Hulk was okay." June 22, 2008
8 Get Smart (2008) 03:11 Wants to be Anne Hathaway's ideal man after what happened in "Brokeback Mountain". He also imitates The Rock. Feels there's too much man love in the movie. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Get Smart wasn't half bad." June 22, 2008
9 Wall-E (2008) 02:51 Immediately gotten confused about chickens and Wall-E. He seems to have a vendetta against them. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, WALLE was good." July 4, 2008
10 Hancock (2008) 02:52 He feels there should be more bum superheroes! We also see what Chester would look like all cleaned up as Chester Alfred B. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Hancock wasn't that bad." July 5, 2008
11 Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008) 03:24 He was going to make a joke about Liz, the fire lady and decided not to. He's convinced the movie was a drug induced fantasy. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Hellboy 2 was just plain silly." July 12, 2008
12 The Dark Knight (2008) 02:34 This was a somber review as the bum felt that there were so many philosophical discussions in the movie. It affected him to the point where he told the audience to keep the change. He also thought it was going to be like the campy 1960s TV show. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, was... I mean DAMN!" July 18, 2008
13 The X-Files: I Want to Believe. (2008) 02:47 He found the movie asked all the questions. One of which was "Do Agents Mulder and Scully make whoopy?" The answer was yes. It was the only question answered. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, X-Files 2 was pretty underwhelming." July 26, 2008
14 Burn After Reading (2008) 03:15 Manages to confuse himself when the movie is about a disc that some people had and so forth. He found the movie to be the Seinfeld of movies where everything and nothing happens. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Burn After Reading was really funny." September 13, 2008
15 The Nerd vs NC: The Final Battle 03:24 The special recap of The Nostalgia Critic and The Nerd final battle seen through his eyes. He also calls out The Nerd himself. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, thanks everybody for watching the feud!" October 17, 2008
16 Twilight (2008) 03:35 He doesn't understand why the vampires sparkle in the daylight among other things like how the two main characters met and the like. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Twilight was per-eeeeee-ty bad!" November 30th, 2008
17 The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) 03:41 Was scared by Keanu Reeves and was criticizing the mother. Did a Keanu Reeve imitation. At the end, Doug says "Seriosuly though, The Day the Earth Stood Still with Keanu Reeves? How do YOU think it was?" December 18th, 2008

2009

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
18 Citizen Kane (1941) 02:25 Actually hates the classic movie and ripped into it as if he was the NC! He considered it one of the worst movies of all time. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Citizen Kane is pretty damn good." February 12, 2009 as part of the Live Donation Drive, posted February 13, 2009)
19 Coraline (2009) 02:24 Feels this movie is really weird, but still the feel-good family film of the year. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Coraline KCIKED ASS!" February 12, 2009 as part of the Live Donation Drive, posted February 14, 2009)
20 Watchmen (2009) 03:18 Feels ripped off because the superheroes in the story were jerks. He says "None of this would happen if Bum Man was here!" He uses heat vision to sterilize the viewers. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Watchmen was, um, wierd." March 10, 2009
21 Monsters vs. Aliens (2009) 04:01 Part of the April Fool's Day gag. Ask That Guy With the Glasses reviewed the movie and called it enjoyable. He also tried to imitate the Bum. Of course, he put his own twist on it. He was given tips by the director and needed to reenact the movie. April 1st, 2009
22 X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009) 03:10 The Bum reviews the first summer blockbuster and we find out he has a girlfriend that is a horse. He also wants to destroy a power plant because he likes to destroy things. At the end, Doug said "Seriously though, X-Men Origins: Wolverine... meh." May 3rd, 2009
23 Star Trek (2009) 03:30 Does not say "Oh my God!" at the beginning. Calling the movie "Asshole Trek" because the people all seem to be assholes, the Bum realizes the universe was rewritten. He makes fun of how the characters get laid unlike the fans. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Star Trek was actually good." May 9th, 2009
24 Terminator Salvation (2009) 03:49 The bum summarized how great the movie was with its effects and how Arnold was in the movie (As a CGI image). We also see the Bum's computer for the first time: it is a cardboard box. At the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Terminator Salvation was just okay." May 23rd, 2009
25 Up (2009) 03:44 Chester talks about the Pixar movie. He loves the name Doug and wonders why NC doesn't like the show at all. He tells NC to lighten up. Of course, the Bum loved the movie! The movie inspired him to tie a ton of balloons to his house to make it fly! It shouldn't be too hard since he lives in a bottle of pepsi now. In the end, Doug said "Seriously though, Up was REALLY good!" June 2nd, 2009
26 Bruno (2009) 04:02 At first, Chester thought he was reviewing the film, "Borat" despite both being done by the same guy. He liked the movie because it took place in real situations. He also ends up arguing with his penis. At the end, Doug said "Seriously though, Bruno was only okay." July 13th, 2009
27 Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009) 03:27 Chester started off the review by saying how now the movie is so dark compared to the first two films. Chester reenacts the plot of the first five movies as well only he adds teen angst with movies five and siz! He took Dummbledore's death well and said that there was no potion or anything he wouldn't take! In the end, Doug said "Seriously though, Harry Potter was actually pretty good." July 18th, 2009
28 District 9 (2009) 03:57 The Bum starts off by saying the movie is the funniest film he had ever seen. He laughs throughout the review explaining how no one wants to reason with the aliens or help them out. Just put them in slums and hope for the best. That and dissect them. He continues to call the movie the funniest movie of all time. He is perplexed when he was told that it was in fact a drama. So, he called it the greatest drama ever since it portrays racism without using race. He doesn't get how it's supposed to be original. He concludes by saying it has nothing original and that's what makes it original. In the end, Doug says "Seriously though, aliens land and we don't ask them where they came from, how they got here, or what we can learn about the universe? We just throw them into the slums? And then people are ACTUALLY calling it original even though it rips off countless other movies? Dude, this movie sucked, that's right, I said it sucked! Bring on the hate mail you mother...oh shit, I wrote alot!" September 9th, 2009
29 2008 Political Campaign (audio) 02:53 This is an audio review of the political race of 2008 Doug performed as a sketch a while back. To sum up, The bum voted for Obama for one simple reason. CHANGE! September 17th, 2009
30 Zombieland (2009) 03:21 The Bum says this really was a funny movie. Not like District 9. He laughed at the cameos and tried not to give spoilers. He hates them. Wait, those were Spaniards. He was a zombie once. He was a member of the Oprah Book Club. He won't spoil the cameos. In the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Zombieland was friggin' hilarious!" October 12th, 2009
31 Where The Wild Things Are (2009) 03:25 Chester warns about spoilers and says the movie was based on an incredible childrens' book. The movie he said was very, very good and then starts to compare it to his own life and the issues he had to face. After all, the moral was to "Just deal with it!" Chester explains how he has to deal with his own problems like how no one gives him change. In the end, Doug says "Seriously though, Where the Wild Things Are was friggin' brilliant!" October 19th, 2009
32 New Moon (2009) 04:14 As usual, Chester warns us about the spoilers and talks about how Bella seems to be an idiot in this move as the werewolf guy tries to get with her and all she could think about was Edward. Edward tries to kill himself and Bella stops him. He thought it was the end. Instead, there was more filler for the next movie. In the end. Doug says "Seriously, New Moon was such a disappointment... it wasn't NEARLY as bad as the first one! What a rip off!" November 22nd, 2009
33 Youmacon 11:17 Chester invades Youmacon and finds a look-alike Bum, '90s kid and others. He reviews the convention, has some laughs and at the end he asks for yen! December 2nd, 2009
34 A Christmas Carol (2009) 04:15 The Bum starts off this special holiday episode singing "Tis the season to have SPOILERS!" and at first he thought the movie was going to be the original Disney version. He reenacts the ghost's speeches to Scrooge, calling him a douche. When Scrooge says he's going to change, the bum says he's the one who needs change! At the end, Doug says "Seriously, Disney's A Christmas Carol was surprisingly decent." December 5th, 2009 as part of the December donation drive. December 9th, 2009 on the site.
35 The Princess and the Frog (2009) 04:57 As usual, spoilers are mentioned and he goes on to talk about the movie. Right away the Bum says Disney lied to him about how wishing upon a star would make all his dreams come true. Then again, he loved the Disney loopholes that occurred in the movie and in other Disney films. He asks if all fairy tales were written by lawyers! Doug says "Seriously, Princess and the Frog was good, but what was up with that lightening bug's death?" December 13th, 2009
36 Avatar (2009) 03:40 He compares the movie to "Pocahontas", "Ferngullly" and "Dances With Wolves" among others. He declares the movie to be so original and says childrens' stories must be retold. Like the Tom and Jerry movie! At the end, Doug says "Seriously. "Avatar"...Lame Story + Pretty images=Pretty lame." December 21st, 2010

2010

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
37 The Wolfman (2010) 03:01 After summarizing the movie's plotline, the bum says it's best to not become a werewolf unless you have insurance. Doug said at the end, "Seriously, The Wolfman was fun." February 14th, 2010
38 Family Guy Response 04:32 The Bum reacts to a very personal joke on the Fox show "Family Guy". February 20th, 2010
39 Alice in Wonderland (2010) 03:22 The bum goes into the movie expecting it to be like the old Disney classic and found everything to be even more confusing and messed up. He wondered why it was called "Underland" instead of Wonderland for example. In the end, Doug says "Seriosuly, Alice in Wonderland looked great, but GOD was it stupid!" March 7th, 2010
40 How to Train Your Dragon (2010) 03:19 The Bum makes note of the boy's weird name and how it's weird like the name Chester. He says the movie is good. Especially the 3D. Doug on the other hand says "Seriously, 'Dragon' was like 'Avatar'...only intentionally funny." March 28th, 2010
41 Iron Man 2 (2010) 04:09 The Bum returns to share his take on the Marvel Comics blockbuster. Right away, The Bum likes how Stark parties all the time in and out of his armor. He wishes he could do that. However, he can no longer go to "Medieval Times". At the end, Doug says "Iron Man 2 was good, mindless fun". May 9th, 2010
42 Prince of Persia (2010) 03:53 The bum right away says the movie was probably the best video game based movie ever. This isn't saying much of course as a thunder clap is heard when Uwe Boll is mentioned. Things like the climbing of the arrows, the time travel and the ostrich racing scenes do not make sense for the bum as he wishes to know what exactly he took. At the end, Doug says the movie was "standard, but, not too bad." May 30th, 2010
43 The Karate Kid (2010) 03:47 The bum starts off by saying the movie should be called the Kung Fu kid because he doesn't really learn karate. He says that instead of the "Coat On, Coat off" method, it should be "Drink on, Drink off!" He insists that it'd work! The bum says the movie may even be better than the original. In the end, Doug says "The Karate Kid was actually a decent remake." June 14th, 2010
44 Toy Story 3 (2010) 03:52 The Bum exclaims that Andy should have brought his toys to college and then asks himself "Wait, I went to college?". As he summarizes the movie, he says he was played with once and remarks how Toy Story got remarkably dark. Like how at the start was "You've got a friend in me." and now the toys are in danger. He believes Andy is having a midlife crisis at 17 and is going to enjoy it! He says it's a wonderful movie but people need to lighten up. At the end, Doug says the movie "was good but man was it dramatic." June 23rd, 2010
45 Twilight: Eclipse (2010) 04:31 The bum starts off by saying Bella is the greatest role model ever because people die because of her. She has to choose between two people. The werewolf and the vampire. The movie seems to not follow any logic. She keeps wanting to get married and have sex with the vampire. The vampire says no and the Bum calls him a Christian vampire. More people die because she was pretentious. She forgot to wear a coat in the mountains and Chester exclaims even a BUM would wear a coat in the mountains! At the end, Doug says, "Seriously, Twilight Eclipse is all the tween porn you've come to expect." July 4th, 2010
46 Inception (2010) 03:26 The bum says the movie was about dreams he had someone enter his dreams once. It turns out that it was Dick Cheney all along. He says a guy in the movie was hard to understand like that guy from The Room. He says the movie sounds confusing and that you shouldn't be. There seems to be a lot of twists in the movie where it's a dream within a dream within a dream. The movie raises many questions for the Bum. Like if it's a dream in a dream or what. Doug says at the end "Seriously, "Inception" was really clever. But, BOY do you have to pay attention." July 18th, 2010
47 The Expendables (2010) 03:25 The bum is amazed that everyone was in the movie such as Arnold, Stallone and others. There was even the guy who played the villain in every single movie he was in. That's usually a giveaway to who the villain of the story is. Chester doesn't care about the plot as explosions are made and guns are shot. Everything also explodes in the movie so it doesn't matter that Arnold only has a brief cameo in it. The movie reminded him of the movies of the 80s with the cheesey action. So, he recommends that everyone see the movie! After fireworks! On his facebook, Doug said it captured the 1980s cheeseyness without winking to the audience. It took itself seriously while still being fun. Cliched action all the way. August 15th, 2010
48 The Social Network (2010) 03:18 It begins with a fake out summary of the creation of Facebook. The bum later goes into detail saying there wasn't really more to it than a guy breaking up with his girlfriend and the creation of the social network site. The movie gives the bum an idea to be a Facebook guy and have thousands of friends. In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "The Social Network" was romanticized but good." October 3rd, 2010
49 Jackass 3D (2010) 3:50 He starts off by saying that everyone thought Jackass was going to bomb and people were right. Everyone thought this movie was going to be a hit. However, the movie had a very hard to follow plot. The bum says the stunts are pretty much like his every day life. Re: He gets hurt a lot. He goes on to say that he was pleased the movie actually has a jackass in it. Chester says the movie was so good that he wants to join the group, too! In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "Jackass" is "Jackass" and I friggin' love it!" October 16th, 2010
50 Paranormal Activity 2 (2010} 3:24 The bum starts off with a quick summary of the first movie, which is found on the Best of TGWTG dvd. This movie however is a sort of prequel to that movie. The bum says the movie concentrates on scary stuff you don't see. The movie is centered around the offering of a first-born child to a demon. Which, someone eventually does. In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "Paranormal Activity 2" was a pretty good sequel. October 24th, 2010
51 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Part 1 (2010) 7:51 The bum ends up in Daisho Con and runs into Lester B. Bum. They decide to review the movie together and also enlist a crowd of cosplayers to assist them. They use different people to act as the movie characters actions while explaining the plot, which seems to involve a lot of running and NOT being at the school. The two bums wrap up the review by saying that the movie needed to lighten up a little and was cut off at a strange, kind of abrupt place for part two. In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "Harry Potter" was good, but dude, lighten up. PS - Special thanks to all the fans at Daisho Con." November 25th, 2010
52 Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader 5:24 The bum starts off with the introduction of annoying brat Eustace and the kids new trip to Narnia. He says they have no major evil to find or defeat and simply must stop a green fart from taking people. Prince Caspian also shows up in command of the movie's title drop, a ship called the Dawn Treader. Many story arcs are brought up and quickly resolved during their travels. Chester says they defeat the green fart and are told by Aslan they cannot return to Narnia since they're old. Then the annoying brat asks if he can, sequel baiting the movie. In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "Dawn Treader" was okay, but it had some serious pacing issues." December 12th, 2010
53 Tron Legacy 4:07 The bum starts off by giving a quick backstory of "Tron" and it's new sequel. He then goes on to mention that there are two Jeff Bridges (one young, one old) in the movie and mimicks The Dude from "The Big Lebowski" for the older Jeff. Chester says the movie revolves around young Jeff wanting to create a perfect utopia by destroying everyone who's flawed. Older Jeff's son Sam helps him try to find a way to return home and meets hot chick Quorra along the way. They end up escaping and making good lives for themselves after Older Jeff sacrifices himself to destroy Younger Jeff. The bum then complains that you barely see Tron in the second movie even though the films are called "Tron." In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "Tron Legacy" was short on story, but big on fun action and visuals." December 20th, 2010

2011

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
54 2011 Chicago Snowstorm 5:35 Chester reports on Chicago's huge snowstorm by...being forced to stand in the middle of it. He spends hours freezing outside during the day and also night. Finally, someone lets him inside in and he finishes his report...only to be accosted by the horrible snow one more time. February 3rd, 2011
55 Rango 5:00 Chester starts to talk about "Rango", when he is suddenly interrupted and knocked out by Raoul Puke. Raoul proceeds to complain about "his" very small cameo in the movie. He then goes on to mention that many things from the movie resemble "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas", despite not saying the movie by name. Raoul also says Clint Eastwood is in the movie even though it's a different voice actor. At the end, Doug says "Honestly, 'Rango' was big on visuals but short on jokes." March 6th, 2011
56 Red Riding Hood 5:12 The announcer mistakenly calls this "Twilight 4" and argues with Chester about it through the review. Chester then goes on to point out the similarities to Twilight and how it's just another "tween girl porn." He also makes fun of Gary Oldman's strange choice of accent. In the end, Doug says "Honestly, 'Red Riding Hood' needed to be a lot worse in order to be entertaining. DULL!" March 13th, 2011
57 Thor 4:23 Chester starts off telling us that Thor is Odin's son who is sent to Earth for his "stupid" actions. Thor's brother is revealed to be an ice monster, the baddies of Asgard, which somehow puts Odin to sleep. The movie then becomes about Thor and Natalie Portman hanging out, Thor's brother becoming the evil king of the ice monsters, and Thor eventually dying and returning to life thanks to his hammer. Chester sums up the final fight and slightly mopey ending while also hinting at the usual Marvel "Dun dun dun!" post-credit scene.

Note: This review does not have a sum-up line at the end. Doug made a follow-up video explaining his thoughts on the movie and stated he will possibly do this for every Bum Review from now on.

May 8th, 2011
58 Pirates of the Caribbean 4 4:54 Chester warns that there are plenty of spoilers and proceeds to mention that, despite being a drunk, apparently Jack Sparrow is the sexiest pirate ever. He also pokes fun at Keith Richard's short cameo and can't believe no one noticed Penelope Cruz was impersonating Sparrow, leading to a Monty Python reference. He jokes about Ian McShane being from the show Deadwood and uses censored swears to emphasize this. Chester goes on to point out the pointless storyline involving a clergyman and a mermaid, wonders why Blackbeard doesn't zombify himself if he can bring back the dead, and overall finds that the whole plot is a bit complicated and doesn't make much sense. May 22nd, 2011
Special See Doug at ConBravo 0:24 Chester makes an announcement for the Ontario con with special guests Doug Walker and Spoony! June 3rd, 2011
59 X-Men First Class 5:30 Chester has a lot to say about the new X-Men movie and proceeds to introduce the two main characters, Xavier and Magneto, by telling of their different childhoods. For some reason, Mystique ends up being Xavier's sister in this storyline as well. Chester says Magneto's main goal is to take down Kevin Bacon (who is a Nazi) because he killed his mother. The two boys grow up as friends, gather a team of mutants to stop him, and of course later become enemies over their differing values. The bum also makes mention of Hugh Jackman's cameo as Wolverine and figures more sequels to this prequel will be made if it makes tons of money. June 5th, 2011
60 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 4:26 Chester starts off by saying that everyone in the HP universe finds Harry special...in that everyone who goes near him dies. He goes on to mention the climatic (not) fight between the nun from "Sister Act" and the British a-hole, and then pokes fun at the similarities between HP and "Return of the King." He also points out how confusing Harry's not-really-a-death is and chastises him for sending his future kid to the same violent-bound school. Finally, although he's sad not to be able to review more HP movies, the bum is ecstatic for Twilight. July 17th, 2011
61 Captain America (BR) 4:27 The bum starts off by comparing Mr. Rogers to...well, Mr. Rogers, and tells us that he is rejected from the army for being a shrimp. Mr. Rogers is thrown into a machine and transformed into a super-soldier and given a rather...flamboyant costume. Chester makes fun of the fact that he manages to save some prisoners despite having a bullseye of a shield, which is later made even more like this with the costume upgrade. Captain America takes on Red Skull, who has a radioactive toilet scum-turning weapon, defeats him and is forced to crash into the Antarctic to save the world. Chester immediately recognizes, once he's saved by Samuel L. Jackson, that the ending is another lead-up to the Avengers movie. He then ends off the review saying that Ma-Ti, despite being dead, deserves to be in it. July 24th, 2011
Special Dr. Insano and the Bum Conquer Canada 13:37 Can the power of SCIENCE and CHANGE bring order to the land of Canada? Dr. Insano and Chester A. Bum go through ConBravo on a mission to take over all of Canada! Will they succeed, or will it be a futile endeavor? August 7th, 2011
62 Real Steel 4:25 Chester immediately tries to joke how the movie is like Rock'Em Sock'Em Robots and Transformers, but he's told those are overused and settles on Transmorphers. He goes on to say that Hugh Jackman is good as a down-on-his-luck ex-boxer who gains a son through the course of the movie. The son is very much adult-like with the use of big words even Chester can't pronounce. He also mentions the climax involves an evil man pitting his champion robot against Jackman's little underdog robot. He proceeds to point out how incredibly similar it is to Rocky IV. In the end, Chester recommends the movie while wanting to see the DVD of Transmorphers. October 9th, 2011
63 Paranormal Activity 3 4:40 Through the review, Chester gets annoyed as the family does stupid things, usually making the demon/ghost angry. He goes over many of the major scares in the movie and what happens to each family member. Since the movie is set during Katie and Kristi's childhood, he also makes reference to Lite Brite and, in the end, Teddy Ruxpin. Mentioning the accursed bear doesn't go over well, however, as Ruxpin ends the review as he did in the NC's Halloween special. October 23rd, 2011
64 Puss in Boots 3:51 Chester almost immediately gets himself into trouble with the furry lovers (don't ask) and quickly jumps into the story of this Shrek spin-off. He mentions how Puss in Boots is a suave do-gooder who was once childhood friends with Humpty Dumpty, a pretty rotten egg (pun intended). Together with a female cat named Kitty, they go to steal the golden eggs from the goose of "Jack and the Beanstalk" fame. Chester laments a couple missed jokes in the movie and how the twist at the climax makes little to no sense. But he finishes up by saying that it's a fun movie despite that. November 6th, 2011
65 Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 5:41 Chester launches into how Bella essentially has two boyfriends but marries the vampiric Edward. He gets slightly annoyed at the fact that she doesn't smile during her wedding day, but gleefully talks about the honeymoon and the destructive (though unprotected) sex they have. He makes fun of the two being surprised when Bella gets pregnant, and also the fact that Edward forces her to listen to him about getting rid of it. Chester goes on to mention the birth of their baby girl, Jacob "imprinting" on her, and Bella dying only to ultimately become a vampire. November 20th, 2011
66 The Muppets 3:48 Chester first makes mention of a Toy Story short shown before the movie and then delves into the plot. Using his hands to act as the puppets, he tells of the Muppets banding together to save their old studio. He pokes fun at Miss Piggy and Kermit once again reflecting on their relationship and eventual singing of "The Rainbow Connection." While he found the ending to be less adult than he wanted, he found the movie to be very enjoyable. November 27th, 2011

2012

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
67 The Artist 2:11 The bum gives us his...silent take on "The Artist," a modern day silent film. While the review is short and sweet, Chester "says" he enjoyed the movie. He manages to get a line in at the end while lamenting his horrible microphone quality. February 9th, 2012
68 The Secret World of Arrietty 3:18 Chester takes a look at the new Miyazaki film. He tells us about Arrietty and her family of Borrowers (who don't exactly borrow, but whatever). He pokes fun at her father refusing to accept that the human boy she meets is totally cool with being her friend and not hurting them. Chester wishes the movie didn't end so seemingly abruptly, wanting to know more about the boy coping with his impending surgery and the Borrowers surviving the wilderness when they're forced to leave their home. He also pleads for change to make a live-action version starring John Goodman (wink wink, nudge nudge). February 25th, 2012
69 John Carter 3:50 Chester checks out the newest sci-fi/action movie! He mentions the movie has a planet called Helium and chastises the film for not having everyone speak with helium voices. He goes on to talk about John's struggle to win over a princess, who is set to marry the bad guy. Chester makes fun of the fact that she is given the opportunity to kill said bad guy but marries him anyway (which is utterly pointless in the end). He also pokes fun at the "bald men." He finishes off by saying that it's a fun outer space movie. March 11th, 2012
Special The Bum Reviews Song 2:48 Chester sings! HURRAY! March 18th, 2012
70 The Hunger Games 3:55 Chester launches the review by introducing shaky cam to the mix in honor of the movie. He proceeds to talk about "Cat Piss" taking the place of her sister in the Hunger Games and how exciting it is watching children kill each other. He mentions Rue and how, despite numerous kids having died in the past, her death riles up the districts against the Games. He makes fun of the back and forth about having two winners rather than one and the prospect of having the sequel. He recommends the movie, though basically says seeing it (especially in IMAX) may make you feel sick due to the shaky cam. March 25th, 2012
71 The Avengers (Bum) 4:32 Chester says this is literally the greatest movie he's ever seen in his life. Soon after, Doug/NC breaks character to gush about it before going back to the "bit." The bum goes on to talk about the plot and characters of the movie, as well as pokes fun at how the movie is like an action-y Michael Bay film done right. He also breaks character once more at the end, urging people to go watch the movie, and ends the video with a quick humorous jab at the inconsistency of Hulk actors. May 6th, 2012
72 Prometheus 3:38 Chester dives into the new "Alien" prequel and proceeds to make fun of the stereotypical characters. He focuses extra attention on an android on the ship who does evil things for some vaguely explained reason. He goes on to mention that several people give birth to alien/squid babies and pretty much everybody dies by the end. Chester is confused how the movie ties into the beginning of "Alien," but believes there will be plenty of sequels to it to slowly explain how they get to that point. June 10th, 2012
73 The Amazing Spider-Man 3:11 Chester checks out the new Spider-Man movie, making a few references to the original trilogy. He points out at least once how parts of the movie scream sequel. He makes fun of Gwen for being much smarter than previous women in the Spidey movies. He also mentions how The Lizard seems to suddenly become evil and how kinda silly his overall plan seems. Overall, he says the movie is...well, amazing. July 8th, 2012
74 The Dark Knight Rises 8:06 Chester starts off by making fun of Bruce Wayne and wishing he'd go back to being Batman instead of a recluse. He talks about how Bane and Catwoman work together to form a dumb plan to bring down Bruce, as well as eventually have him trapped in a relatively easily escapable prison. Bane takes over Gotham with threats of detonating a bomb, even though, as Chester mocks, he'll detonate it anyway later. The bum also makes fun of the true mastermind's reveal, and Catwoman and Batman hooking up at the end of the film despite not seeming to have a thing for each other. July 22nd, 2012
75 Paranormal Activity 4 4:24 Chester kicks the review off by quickly going over the other three movies. He makes mention of the use of the Kinect and a scene with a knife for having decent but kind of weak scares. This also includes the beginning of the movie, which has a couple jump scares. He says Katie somehow had lost Hunter, only to "adopt" the Robbie kid. Chester also pokes fun at the ending, where the blonde girl tries to escape from Katie while still awkwardly filming with her camera. The girl is killed (as is typical for this series). Chester gets a little annoyed that more questions have been raised than answers, but he will make sure to watch Paranormal Activity 5. October 22nd, 2012
76 Wreck-It Ralph 7:31 The bum becomes distressed over his rise in fame and can't even be consoled by Linkara. He forlornly tells the camera about not loving himself and wishing he could love his fans back. He manages to go into Wreck-It Ralph and does the review, getting happier as he describes plot points involving Ralph, Felix, "the glitch", and the evil Candy King. He decides in the end not to ask for change and goes to join his fans, while Linkara laments how he hates the Bum's reviews. November 7th, 2012
77 Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2 10:54 Chester, along with "Brad" (Skitch) and "Jake" (Y Ruler of Time), review the final Twilight movie Brad Jones-in-car style. They point out the insanity of the overuse of super speed, the ugliness of Bella's CG baby, and how ridiculously over the top the villain is. While "Brad" and "Jake" despise the movie, the bum loves it and treats it as one big comedy. He ends the review trying to ask for change, only to be unable to find a suitable cup.

Note: This review is where Doug's usual serious reviews have ended. His reviews have become their own show, entitled Sibling Rivalry.

November 21st, 2012
78 A Christmas Story 2:46 Kicking off a month of Christmas reviews (Bummy Christmas Reviews), Chester looks at the classic story about a boy on a mission to get a BB gun. He mainly makes fun of the boy wanting it (since it's dangerous), and says he also shot his eye out once. At the start of the review, he's in a hotel room, which he laments is better than his one wall he's always forced to stand in front of. At the end, he hopes the reviews will continue so he can stay in the warm room. December 1st, 2012
79 Die Hard 2:33 Chester continues to enjoy his warm room for the holidays as he looks at the action-packed film. He mentions several times how big his balls feel talking about the movie and even its many sequels. He pokes fun at John McClane's catchphrase and Hans Gruber being German. December 3rd, 2012
80 National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 2:11 Chester reminds everyone how funny Chevy Chase used to be (in his opinion) while talking about the classic comedic film. He pokes fun at the various family members and how awful Chevy is to his wife and family in general. Still, he likes it for the comedy it is. December 5th, 2012
81 The Grinch Who Stole Christmas 2:33 Chester talks about the animated classic. He mentions there being a "Who-sus" and goes into his take on the religion of Whoville. He also questions why they sing around and seem to worship a giant radioactive ball of light at the end. December 7th, 2012
82 The Rankin Bass Christmas Specials 2:08 Chester takes a general look at the Rankin Bass specials, making reference to Rudolph in particular. He acknowledges that the specials are a yearly tradition for people to view. However, he is deathly afraid of them because of their soulless, dead, puppet eyes and rag doll-ness. December 9th, 2012
83 A Charlie Brown Christmas 1:40 Chester doesn't understand why the Charlie Brown special is so beloved. He acknowledges that it has a good message and is basically wholesome, but also knows it hasn't aged well animation and acting-wise. Despite this, however, he's happy it wasn't made by Rankin Bass. December 11th, 2012
84 Elf 2:44 For the last Bummy Christmas review, the bum looks at the Will Ferrell film Elf. He doesn't think it's really good or bad and can't believe that's the last movie he has to cover. He then launches into an excited tirade where he improves the film by casting Alf and combining all the other Christmas movies he reviewed into it to create a huge battle royale. He ends off the video by calling up Donnie DuPre of Demo Reel to make his idea into a movie. December 13th, 2012
85 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 4:25 The bum looks at the first in the new Hobbit film trilogy. He points out how no one will ever remember the dwarves' names and that that's why Bilbo is the most marketable. He laments there being no Leonard Nimoy ballad and the lack of Tom Bombadil yet again. Chester also makes fun of how the eagles never stick around when they would easily make the journey much simpler to take. Overall he enjoyed the movie, despite the necessary cliffhanger ending. December 17th, 2012


2013

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
86 Oz the Great and Powerful 3:53 Chester's back for another year and looking at Sam Raimi's newest film. He talks about Oz (the man) and his casting out of town for not being an all-powerful magician, then makes fun of "Twister" when he's taken to Oz (the land). He pokes fun at how weird and flip-floppy the witches are in the film. Chester outlines Oz's not-so-surprising plan that catapults him to king of the land and drives out the witches, then ends the review wanting ruby slippers of his own since they aren't mentioned in the film. March 11th, 2013
87 Iron Man 3 4:25 Chester immediately makes fun of Tony Stark for being both smart AND dumb at making decisions, like giving out his home address to a terrorist. He jokes about Tony's random panic attacks (incorrectly) brought on by wanting to save Pepper Potts, which he constantly fails at doing. He points out that Guy Pierce is the real villain of the movie, though he only wants to continue selling some evil heat thingy. At the end, Chester accidentally blurts out his own address - a Lucky Charms box on 33rd - and is forced to abandon his CHANGE! catchphrase to try to stop people from wrecking it. May 6th, 2013
88 Star Trek: Into Darkness 6:03 Chester jokes about Kirk having the Enterprise taken from him, knowing it will be his again anyway. He points out that the villain is obviously Khan even before he says so himself and treats him like Hannibal Lector. He also mentions Uhura and Spock's bickering, comparing it to an Everybody Loves Raymond episode. Near the end of the movie, he mocks the use of Wrath of Khan lines during Kirk's death scene and is confused that Khan is taken down easily by Spock and Uhura. Chester ends the review saying the movie is good, but he would gladly make a sequel where Khan is used to his fullest. May 20th, 2013
89 Man of Steel 5:00 Instead of Chester, Zod is running the review! He is upset that he's not in the new Superman film and has been replaced by some "fake" Zod. The review is done by him explaining all the bad things he did to the movie as revenge. This includes causing shaky cam, making the same plot point be stated multiple time and making everyone's acting bland, among other things. Chester interrupts in the end saying he's locked out and Zod flies off, leaving Chester to start his review only to be cut off. June 17th, 2013
90 Despicable Me 2 4:55 Chester jumps right in by mocking the plot of the movie, saying it's more like disjointed funny scenes. He makes mention of the Minions looking like Simpsons penises and how they only serve as comic relief. He points out Gru's resemblance to The Penguin as well. In the end, while Chester enjoyed the movie and the Minions, he asks that only one more movie be made so the franchise doesn't wear completely thin. July 5th, 2013
91 Gravity 4:02 The bum starts off introducing the cast, which consists of Sandra Bullock, George Clooney and a Red Shirt. He points out how calm and collected Clooney is and attributes it to him being George Clooney with a rocket pack. He tells of Bullock's struggle to find a properly working space station, and her run-in with a now ghost Clooney.Chester concludes that the movie was tense, but warns people not to go into space because of all the danger, unlike a snake pit. He's then bitten by his "souvenir" Charlie, the one-eyed snake. October 9th, 2013
92 Ender's Game 5:21 Chester goes into how the movie involves weird video game simulations and a battle training arena that bears little relevance to the plot of the movie. He mentions how Harrison Ford acts like an old, bulldog, lower-jaw-always-hanging-open Indiana Jones and how he's an unlikable douche. He's a bit unsure of the ending battle's results, but ultimately decides it's mostly a good thing. However, he does make fun of the alien queen being nearby the whole time and is hopeful about Ender's future adventures. November 4th, 2013
93 Thor: The Dark World 7:09 Chester jumps into the movie and makes fun of Thor's fanservice-y shirtless scene. He also mocks how Thor continues to trust Loki even though he's not in the film as much this time around. Chester mocks Natalie Portman's annoying "comedic" friends/colleagues, pointing out that their only role is comedy and not much else. He also makes fun of the movie's plot and vague villain as well. November 11th, 2013
94 Hunger Games - Catching Fire 5:05 Chester mocks the fake relationship between Katniss and Peeta and how her "actual love" is very much a third wheel like Jacob from the Twilight movies. He also makes fun of the clock mechanic in the Hunger Games as designed by Dusty fro "Twister." He points out that Katniss gets very lucky in her escape attempt and that her rescue hinged on several nearly impossible variables. In the end, Chester enjoyed the movie and decides it would be fun to bring the Hunger Games to Chicago. November 25th, 2013

2014

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
95 The Lego Movie 5:04 Chester opens the review saying he wanted to use Lego figures, but they were sold out. He instead tries using the Nostalgia Critic's Rogue figure, only to find it sticky and throw it away in disgust. He makes fun of the movie's cliched characters but later gushes at having Lego Batman in it. Chester ultimately likes the movie and says that now children everywhere will get into and enjoy Legos, though they may get bored attempting stop-motion movies. He then asks for someone to get rid of the Rogue doll because he doesn't want it near him. February 13th, 2014
96 Muppets Most Wanted 4:04 Chester mentions the plot involving the evil frog Constantine teaming up with Ricky Gervais to steal money they don't really need. This involves Constantine taking Kermit's place in the show while the Muppets try to solve this problem via fourth wall jokes. He then gets confused by Constantine's plot to marry Miss Piggy as a distraction, saying that he thought that already happened in "Muppets Take Manhattan." The review ends with him wondering why nobody questions Amy Adams and Jason Segel not appearing and if the Muppets movies will continue along the same, dreary path as the originals. March 22nd, 2014
97 Captain America: The Winter Soldier 5:15 Chester immediately starts off by poking fun at Samuel L. Jackson "dying" in the movie and how S.H.I.E.L.D. resorts to using taser sticks to try to subdue Captain America. He then wonders how the Nazi scientist from the first film was about to be put into a computer during an era that hadn't perfected porn yet. He also makes fun of Bucky being unmemorable and being a non-twist in the movie. The review ends with him having enjoyed the movie and being intrigued by the evil "Wonder Twins." April 6th, 2014
98 The Amazing Spider-Man 2 4:14 Chester mocks Peter and Gwen trying to stay away from each other and talks about how Electro's motivation is weak to make way for a plot about Harry Osborn. He pokes fun at Rhino's pointless cameo several times through the review as well. The bum mentions how Uncle Ben's killer is never found and the mystery of the Parkers' deaths was as cliched as most action movie deaths. In the end, he wishes to be a superhero too and takes one last jab at the movie's multiple plot threads. May 4th, 2014
99 Godzilla (BR) 6:15 Chester jumps into the review making fun of Bryan Cranston's (aka Breaking Malcolm's Dad) death in the movie. He chalks it up to how his name has "And" beside it in the credits. He goes on to talk about how when Godzilla is pitted against monsters terrorizing America states, the scene always cuts to the aftermath of the fights. This frustrates Chester until the final fight, when you get to see a bit of monster fighting in a dark, hard-to-see scene. He also mocks the Japanese scientist who proclaims that doing nothing to stop the monsters will allow people to survive, despite all the destruction they cause around civilians. In the end, Chester enjoys the movie despite the lack of Godzilla in it. May 17th, 2014
100 X-Men: Days of Future Past 4:12 Chester points out that Wolverine has to be sent back in time via Shadowcat, who couldn't do that before. He also makes fun of Hugh Jackman typically showing off his body in every X-Men movie. He points out how messed up the X-Men continuity is between the old and new films, especially with the events of previous films being altered by this one. In the end, despite the sound of the next movie's plot, Chester is really excited that X-Men will be a more faithful adaptation of the comics. May 27th, 2014
101 Maleficent 4:17 Chester talks about Maleficent's past, specifically her relationship with the king who suddenly becomes evil. He also points out how the king makes the not-so-sensible plan to send Aurora away with the fairies, who have no experience with children. He points out that Maleficent wanting to care for Aurora seems counterproductive as well. In the end, while he acknowledges that the movies makes no sense, he as usual enjoyed it. May 31st, 2014
102 How to Train Your Dragon 2 4:24 Chester talks about how Hiccup has grown up since the events of the first film and makes fun of the villain's motivation for taking over the world. He also pokes fun at why the mother left Hiccup, and how the father dying is a cliche. He points out that the mother could easily take over as queen following the death of the father. He also acknowledges that the flying and battle scenes are pretty. In the end, he calls the movie awesome, but not good as an "instructional" film. June 14th, 2014
103 Guardians of the Galaxy 5:35 August 2nd, 2014
104 Michael Bay's TMNT 4:16 August 9th, 2014

DVD Exclusives

These Bum Reviews are exclusives that are part of the DVDs sold at the store.

Episode Number Movie Episode Length Description Date Released
TGWTG Vol. 1 Paranormal Activity

(2007)

2:36 He starts off describing that the house is haunted and the psychic does next to nothing to help the two main characters. He then realizes that the house must be haunted by the Ninja Turtles and says the movie was like a cross between "The Blair Witch Project" and "Wife Swap" (It makes sense in context, trust me). In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "Paranormal Activity" was ok." March 10, 2010
TGWTG Vol. 1 G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009) 4:02 The bum explains the movie's ultimate weapon, a warhead filled with mosquitoes and questions if the scientist who invented it was high that day. Chester then goes on to quote Cobra Commander, praise the Baroness, and wonders why the warhead would have an "off" button. He enjoyed the movie, but basically says the movie's main fault is that none of it has anything to do with the cartoon series. In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "G.I. Joe" was G.I. SHIT." March 10, 2010
Kickassia Kickassia (2010) 3:41 The bum starts off explaining that the "Nostalgima Critic" wants his own nation and points out that Molossia's president's name sounds like a sheep. He also says that although he had to pay to be in it, he put all the change he asks for to good use. Chester then mentions how the Critic becomes a lazy douche and makes fun of the Snob for sounding like Jack Nicholson, which "leads" to his banishment. He then outlines the team's plans to first use Dr. Insano, which fails, then to go in and just shoot at the Critic. He also mentions that since Santa Christ comes back from the dead, he is now Zombie Christ. To sum up, Chester says they would love to do more anniversary videos, but need your change to do them. October 17th, 2010
TGWTG Vol. 2 Scott Pilgrim VS The World 3:29 Chester immediately tells us the movie is weird and points out that the main character, who is the boy forever playing a boy, moans and groans about life until he meets and wants a biyotch-y girl over his hot girlfriend. The girl's seven evil exes must be defeated and the bum lists off a few of them. He then goes into the final fight and makes fun of the main character for having a Twilight complex with the biyotch-y girl. In the end, Doug says "Seriously, "Scott Pilgrim" was cleverly mindless." April 1st, 2011
To Boldly Flee To Boldly Flee (BR) 5:10 Chester makes fun of the critics' lack of trust in the Critic, then attempts and fails to compare the houseship to the house from "Up." He mocks the villains' appearances and attitude, as well as the fact that Ma-Ti and "Forky" reside both left the site, yet are in the same body. He also gladly pokes fun at the ending meeting between the Writer and NC and says the Plot Hole merge is full of Jesus symbolism. At the end, he laments that the NC is gone, but then asks if he can have a show every week to spew his own opinion. October 20th, 2012
TGWTG Vol. 4 Django Unchained 3:57 The bum talks about Tarantino's newest movie, which features several familiar faces from his other films including Samuel L. Jackson in particular. Chester makes fun of D'Caprio's "generous" character, noting he still looks like a kid while acting. He also points out how the calm Nazi character is, of all people, the one to screw things up for Django. In the end, Chester lectures that putting the review on the Internet is no better than owning slaves/making slave jokes, which he claims he's allowed to do and then is blown up for it. May 4th, 2013
TGWTG Vol. 4 Les Miserables 4:29 Chester tackles the lengthy story and mocks the film's used of quick transitions to not show Valjean's journey to becoming mayor or his adopted daughter growing up. He mentions the French Revolution 2.12 battle scenes and politely says that Hugh Jackman would only hit those high notes during his song if he had no balls. Most of the review, however, is peppered with singing, notably whenever Javert aka Russell Crowe appears. He mocks Crowe's monotone tone, and at the end of the review decides that instead of asking for change, he'd sing for it in the same tone. This is done to the tune of "Do You Hear The People Sing?" May 4th, 2013

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