SCI-Spy #3
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Released
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June 17, 2013
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Running time
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21:42
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Previous review
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Next review
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Tagline
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Space espionage at its dullest and most uninteresting!
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Link
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Linkara: (looking depressed, with his head on his hand) Hello, and welcome to Atop the Fourth Wall, where bad comics burn. You know, we live in an age of miracles and wonder.
(Cut to a clip of a Louis C.K. concert film)
Louis C.K.: We're all just so mad: "I hate my phone, it sucks!" No, it doesn't! It's amazing! The shittiest cell phone in the world is a miracle!
(A montage of modern technological marvels is shown)
Linkara (v/o): Say what you will about Louis C.K., but he's right about this point: we have such amazing technology at our disposal these days. A guy in Japan can take a photo of a flower, put it on Tumblr, and in an hour, it's been viewed by 50,000 people all across the world. We can communicate instantaneously to any point on Earth. Chris Hadfield can perform his rendition of David Bowie's "Space Oddity" on the friggin' International Space Station. Hell, he did regular videos from Earth orbit itself! Speaking of space...
(A screenshot showing a diagram of the Alcubierre Warp Drive is shown)
Linkara (v/o): ...scientists are saying it's possible we could have Star Trek's warp drive in your lifetime and mine! Interstellar and planetary flight!
(The modern technology montage continues)
Linkara (v/o): We have 3D printers and advancing medical technology and crops that grow in any environment and feed the hungry.
Linkara: (frustrated) So why is it, if the time we live in right now is so miraculous and awesome, that most of the time that we see the future, like in "SCI-Spy", it's always so stupid?!
(Cut to black)
Linkara (v/o): Previously on the "SCI-Spy" reviews...
(A montage of shots of the first two "SCI-Spy" comics is shown)
Linkara (v/o): Sebastian Starchild, AKA James Bond without the charisma, charm or Lazenby, is a dude in the future who is special because he hasn't been genetically or technologically modified. He is charged by a computer named Motherbank... Mother Machine last week, Motherbank this week... Stop naming your computers after your parents! ...to infiltrate a space terrorist group called Shadow Black and subsequently takes them all down or something, I don't know. I really have a hard time remembering this stuff. I remember sugar cubes in space releasing man-eating robo-bugs or whatever, and Starchild and a woman named Nile being the worst secret agents ever, since all they do is walk into a bar and ask to become members of a terrorist group! I also call them "characters" in the loosest definition of the word. They are very bland, emotionless, and seem to only display personality traits when they're convenient for a single conversation and are then quickly forgotten so they can get back to being boring. Maybe we'll get to actual spy stuff this issue. Or maybe I'll just throw the comic onto the futon in anger like I usually do.
(Editor's note: "Hey, look! Cybermats!")
Linkara (v/o): It's all pretty likely at this point.
Linkara: So let's dig into (holds up today's comic) "SCI-Spy #3" and hope that in this one, we have Timothy Dalton playing Starchild. It certainly makes for a more interesting performance.
(AT4W title sequence plays; title card has "Space Oddity" playing in the background. Cut to a closeup of the comic's cover)
Linkara (v/o): While I'm reading from a trade, the "SCI-Spy" covers never fail to be rather lame. This one features Nile resting herself in a rather uncomfortable position against the borders of the cover, while Starchild poses with his gun, and there's a purple starfield behind them. It is a very bland cover that tells us nothing about the contents of the comic other than the fact that Nile wears uncomfortable-looking high heels for her so-called "spy work". Nothing else to say, except that Nile also looks like she's bored out of her mind. I don't blame her.
(The comic opens to the first page)
Linkara (v/o): We open on...
Narrator: Naga: Harshest of the Outside Worlds, virgin and uninhabited, a planet of barren crystals...
Linkara: (narrator voice) Soon home to many fast food chains.
Linkara (v/o): Nile and Starchild have landed here to try to stop the evil space robot bugs, because I guess they found out they were from here, I guess? I don't know. There's a reason why it takes so long for me to review each issue of this series: I usually fall asleep while reading it. They take out some large weapons and have on spacesuits that apparently have fins and scales on their backs, I imagine to make the spacesuits go faster. They're heading towards an ammonia ice cave in search of the Lucifer File... that I think was brought up last time?
Nile: Perfect place to stash the "Lucifer File."
Starchild: Also a perfect place for something else.
Nile: Such as?
Linkara: (as Starchild) Our personalities. I almost expressed an emotion the other day and I need to get rid of it before it spreads.
Starchild: Our death-trap.
Linkara: (as Starchild) So let's just walk right into something that's probably a trap without any kind of plan on how to deal with said trap.
Nile: Then we'll just have to steal the cheese without getting our tails snapped.
Starchild: Sounds like a plan, Nile--but one with a problem.
Nile: Namely?
Linkara: Namely that that's not really a plan. It's more of a mission statement.
Linkara (v/o): A robotic snake thing comes down to attack, but they shoot it before it can grab them.
Nile: A Mech-Sentinel. Good eye, Starchild-- but no cheese.
Linkara: (as Nile) Not even a delicious cream filling.
Linkara (v/o): Also, I just noticed that Nile's spacesuit is custom-designed to be skintight on her. Admittedly, they probably needed an artistic cue to make the two look different, but considering later on in the comic there's actual nudity, I can't help but feel the artist just wanted to draw another woman in tight clothing. They head inside deeper and find the Lucifer File... which is apparently sealed inside of a metallic polyhedron. (dramatically) Behold, the Ancient Mystic D100! A man once tried to play "Dungeons and Dragons" with this sacred tool and was forever cursed by its power!
Starchild: Tempting us from the end of what looks like a gauntlet.
Linkara (v/o): Yeah, a gauntlet. If by "gauntlet", you mean "a bad modern art statue".
Linkara: Eh, I guess it's not that weird. I mean, I keep my USB flash drives on top of a lizard, like this. (holds up a toy horse)
Linkara (v/o): Now, the next line of dialogue suggests that he meant a gauntlet, as in a difficult challenge or punishment or whatever, but look at this panel. It's a big open room with ice columns! That's not a gauntlet, either. Anyway, Starchild wants to actually have a plan to grab it, but Nile decides that now would be a good time to be an idiot by running straight at the thing and tripping a laser sensor.
ASS SHOT
Linkara (v/o): The columns blow up and unveil a bunch of adorable frog creatures with cybernetic enhancements. Aw, look at them! They're so cute! They can leap around and have sharp blade things attached to their sides that can stab people. It's just so cute!
Linkara: (scanning a Cybermat) And they seem strangely familiar to me, as if they remind me of something, but... for the life of me, I can't figure out what.
Linkara (v/o): And these assholes just SHOOT THEM AND BLOW THEM UP! You idiots, keep one intact, reprogram it, and make it a pet! This comic has discovered a whole new way to piss me off! Anyway, Nile grabs the file off its pedestal, which sets off another trap. The cave begins collapsing around them. They make a run for it and manage to escape the ice cave before it completely falls on them.
Nile: Perfect trap maybe, Starchild--but only until it met our unsnapped asses.
Linkara: Are asses usually known for snapping?
(He shrugs and swings his rear to the side. It makes a snapping sound as it does, to his amazement)
Linkara: Hmm.
Linkara (v/o): And so, they fly back to get the Lucifer File to Motherbank, and right the hell out of nowhere, Nile throws this out...
Nile: Sounds like a plan without a problem-- Your place or mine?
Starchild: Ever been inside a Tesseract?
Nile: See, I knew I'd get you to talk dirty.
Linkara: Ha! Yeah, she sure did know that she'd get him to talk dirty! (nods awkwardly) When the hell was that established? And why does she suddenly want to make out with him? And what's so dirty about a Tesseract? It's just a friggin' holodeck.
Linkara (v/o): We suddenly cut ahead to whenever the hell later, and Motherbank reports that the information from the Lucifer File has disabled the evil bug thingies. So... comic over? Please? Pretty please?
Motherbank: Mission accomplished, et cetera, and it's nice to see you've buried your mutual animosity. I want you to know that should you decide to become lov--
Starchild: Privacy, Motherbank.
Linkara: Isn't it just like a mom to care too much about your dates? Or in this case, the woman who said you looked like a pimp in the previous issue and then you called her a bitch? This comic is stupid.
Linkara (v/o): The two walk along the holographic beach together and talk about how it doesn't feel like the danger's over. Naturally, she has become Holly Goodhead to his Roger Moore. I know it seems a little sudden, but it must have been how he wooed her with his charm and charisma... (laughs uproariously at the absurdity of it all) Oh, man, I couldn't even finish that sentence.
Nile: Feels like the worlds was far too easy. But maybe we just work well together. ...And maybe in more ways than one.
Linkara: (as Nile) What I'm trying to say is, do I shake your martini? (grins suggestively and raises his eyebrows up and down)
Starchild: I counted at least five, Nile...
Linkara: (as Starchild) I do have a bit of genetic modification, Nile. I have four down there. (as Nile) Penises? (as Starchild) No, nipples. I have a lactation fetish. (grins suggestively)
(Cut to Linkara putting on a blue coat; he looks to the camera with a startled look)
Linkara: Oh... You caught me in between costumes here... Uh, we'll be right back.
(He walks off as the AT4W logo appears, and we go to commercial; upon return, we see Linkara again taking off his blue coat and replacing it with a silver one)
Linkara: Uh... Qapla' or something. We're back. (the AT4W logo appears in the corner) I'm running out of costumes!
(Back to the comic again as the review resumes)
Linkara (v/o): And after scaring the crap out of her with a holographic giant shark, she's in the mood for some bland, emotionless spy lovin'. We cut to them in bed together, naked, probably because he finished early, and it was kind of awkward afterwards, and he wasn't that great at it anyway, and the lactation thing just kind of got weird after a while. After he dreams of all the weirdos he had encountered in the previous two issues, his computer wakes him up and informs him that Nile went back to her space station a few hours ago, probably because she couldn't stand his snoring. He looks out onto his holograms of people, and the computer comments that it's a beautiful scene.
Starchild: Whole lot of everything, orb--except what I want.
Linkara: (as Starchild) I just want to be a spy who wears bright pink neon tights! Is that so wrong?
Starchild: Either way, I'm still alone...
Linkara: (as Starchild, singing) All by myself... Don't want to be...
Starchild: (narrating) Forever alone.
(Cut to a clip of an episode of Scrubs)
Dr. Cox: (lying on the floor, reading a newspaper) God, you're boring.
(Cut back to the comic)
Linkara (v/o): Nile teleports back down to his place and whispers to him that he needs to pretend like the mission is indeed over and they'll go for a romantic evening out. As such, she takes him outside and informs him that she traced the path of the space sugar cubes and discovered that it didn't come from the Outer Worlds like they originally thought, but actually a black hole closer to them, which logically nothing should be able to escape from.
Linkara: (holding up index finger) Ah, so those machine people who rebuilt V'ger when it fell into a black hole also sent a care package of other killer robots.
Linkara (v/o): Starfile [sic] tries to justify the non-science here when it comes to black holes by suggesting that this is actually a wormhole and that this is a lot bigger than just some rogue terrorist organization. I might actually be interested in this revelation except for the crappy artwork, with Starchild's massive eye there. This seems to be a recurring problem with this artist. The other two issues had Starchild having crappy proportions on his face, too. It's not helped with all the closeups, either, and it's Nile's turn. Her eyes are suddenly in a completely different design from the more angular, cat-like eyes we've seen before, and these are more human, if out of proportion. Anyway, Starchild says that Motherbank must have known the true origin of the cubes and kept them in the dark about it, thus confirming what Terrorist Dude from the previous issue said about Motherbank not being trustworthy. They decide to go off and investigate, aaaand for some reason, this panel has been separated into four panels because... why? They were trying to show someone spying on them or something; I'm not seeing anything. There really is no reason for these panels to be separated. We cut to two days later, at a warehouse on an Outer World, where one dude is complaining to another about the crap they're bringing in and wondering what the hell the guy they work for does with this stuff.
Warehouse worker: Consumes it, enjoys it, trashes it. Why do we care?
Linkara: (as another warehouse worker) Because we're here to provide clumsy exposition. Didn't you even read your employee contract?
Warehouse worker: How the hell does he burn through so much crap so fast?
Linkara: Hmm, obviously, he's an Internet reviewer. We absorb garbage media into ourselves to grow more powerful. (takes a DVD of The Andromeda Strain and rubs it on his chest) Yes, Andromeda Strain miniseries! FEED ME!
Linkara (v/o): Nile and Starchild walk in, wearing the exact same concealing outfits as the other guys, yet somehow these dudes instantly realize that they don't know them.
Warehouse worker: Who the hell are you two?
Starchild: We two... are the new crew.
Linkara: (as Starchild) You know, the New Crew. We're a sci-fi-themed boy band, looking for new members.
Linkara (v/o): Seriously, was that supposed to be a quip? I don't even get it. Okay, well, it turns out the dudes in suits are actually the crew of a freighter bringing the stuff up to whoever they were talking about, and that's why they don't recognize the two. But then still, why did they need to say the line about the New Crew? Whatever. Oh, and you think we're done with the dumb dialogue? Starchild tosses a popcorn ball at the two that floats in front of them, and here is their reaction...
Warehouse worker 1: They're hijackers! But is this thing what I think it is?
Warehouse worker 2: You're thinkin' a popper?
Warehouse worker 1: Yeah.
(Cut to a clip of the game Resident Evil)
Leon: Yeah.
(Back to the comic again)
Linkara (v/o): They're just standing there, not even trying to run away from the explosives that go off in their faces! They get through all of that without even a "Get down" or anything! I would add the Bulk and Skull music to these clowns, but I'd hate to give them that kind of dignity. Anyway, the super-duper-spies take the freighter up to a space station, which is home to the Outer Worlds' magistrate. They quickly storm the cargo bay and blast their way through some robots until they arrive at the Pleasure Dome of the magistrate, which features lots of women with boobs that I have to censor. Well, thank God we have this scene or else there wouldn't be naked women in this sci-fi spy thriller or whatever. And yet, I can see more personality in the naked women with lustful expressions than I've seen in our leads. Anyway, they tell the magistrate to cooperate or else they'll kill him and that they've already taken out all his guards and robots. Uh, were there only, like, three guys on the entire station? You were implying a minute before you were in a hurry, and this place looks pretty damn big from the outside. Also, despite having no issues knocking everybody else out or killing people if they don't get their way, suddenly, they seem iffy about killing all the naked ladies. Said naked ladies also start groping our heroes, producing more horrible artwork, like Nile's massive head versus normal body. This makes even less sense since Starchild calls them "teched-up dolls", suggesting they're just sex robots, so why not shoot them?
Linkara: Well, obviously, it's because then the naked ladies would have blood or technological circuitry exposed. And thus, they would be unsexy. (nods, then rolls his eyes in frustration)
Linkara (v/o): Anyway, they identify themselves as SCI-Spy agents, and the magistrate says that they work for Motherbank, who is apparently the magistrate of the Inner Worlds, too. He confesses to working with that Shadow Black terrorist organization before, but that he hasn't seen them in months, claiming to have no connection with what happened with the sugar cubes and robo-bugs. Nile doesn't buy it and says that he's just covering up about the black hole, but the magistrate insists that there's an alien force involved in this.
Nile: There are no aliens! We've searched for more than a thousand years! There's no one but us!
Linkara: (incredulously) REALLY?!?
Linkara (v/o): You're seriously telling me that ALL the creatures we've encountered in this comic, the alien bug assassins, the naked lizard robot in the other room, ALL of the things that have CLEARLY been aliens, are just more of the genetic modifications thing, but they're all still humans?! This comic is really freaking dumb! Also, Nile, where the hell is your neck, and why is your shoulder protruding off like that for the wretched perspective in this panel? The magistrate hits a button at his bar, which opens up the floor and reveals a tank filled with orange soda. The magistrate says that he encountered what's inside of the tube, and Starchild just jumps to the conclusion that whatever it is came through the wormhole. The magistrate says that it came from the old home world, from Earth, but Nile awkwardly explains that that's impossible because the Earth was destroyed and their ancestors migrated from there.
Magistrate: A lie, Agent Nile, nothing but an audacious cover story-- concocted by your precious Motherbank to mask the truth. Indeed, Earth's actual fate is veiled behind the Arcturus System's great secret and great shame.
Linkara: (as magistrate) It was decided long ago that instead of producing new episodes of Sherlock, they'd just move the entire population of Earth!
Linkara (v/o): No, in fact, the secret is in this weird-ass alien thing in the tube.
Magistrate: Our history is nothing but myth, a clever myth-- even I believed it--until Shadow Black brought this to me...
Linkara: You people apparently have genetic modification to the point where people can look pretty much anyway, so why didn't you believe it was just a dumb hoax? And why don't the two spies believe it's a fake?
Linkara (v/o): And so, our comic ends with the magistrate stating that Earth wasn't actually destroyed, but instead, humans were thrown off of Earth by these aliens and are now going to use the wormhole to come and conquer humanity. WELL, WHY THE HELL DIDN'T THEY JUST DO THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE?! And why do they still care about doing this a thousand years later with secret robot bugs, instead of just flat-out trying to conquer them?! They seem strong enough to kick us off of Earth the first time without resistance!
Linkara: (angrily holding up comic) This comic sucks! It's boring, the characters are idiots, the dialogue is unnatural, the artwork even more unnatural, and the revelations are lame! (holds up index finger) Just remember, my friends: as technology advances and even more wonders are achieved, try your hardest to not make the future as STUPID AS IN "SCI-SPY"! (throws down comic, gets up and leaves)
(End credits roll)
I suppose the "unsnapped asses" could refer to the mouse trap comment about snapped tails, but it just seems awkward and doesn't need the arrogance behind it, either.
Plus it just sounds stupid.
So despite being in the future and apparently all humanity exiled from earth, we still have mice and mouse traps? Or was it just the board game that survived in the future and they make up legends about the giant mice that had to be fought in the ancient past?
(Stinger: Linkara picks up the DVD of The Andromeda Strain)
Linkara: I'm rubbing a DVD on myself. What has become of my life? (laughs)
(end)
Atop the Fourth Wall Transcripts
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Spider-Man 56 · Doom's IV 2 · Batman 147 · The Top 15 WTF Moments in Comics · Titans 1 · Sinnamon 11 · US-1 1 · S.C.I. Spy 1 · Superman At Earth's End
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Pitt 1 · Scarlett comic 1 · Future Five 1 · Ultimates 3 1 and 2 · Ultimates 3 3 and 4 · Ultimates 3 5 · Youngblood 2 · Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers 1 · Strange Adventures 136 · Doom's IV 1/2 · X-Men comic 1 · Darker Image 1 · The Dark Knight Strikes Again Part 2 · Sultry Teenage Super-Foxes 2 · Star Trek/X-Men 1 · Athena 1 · JLA - Act of God Part 1 · JLA - Act of God Part 2 · JLA - Act of God Part 3 · Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Meet Archie · Lunatik 1 · Chuck Norris Karate Kommandos 1 · AT4W & Spoony: Experiment Warrior 2-3 · The Dark Knight Strikes Again Part 3 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: Fit to Win · Anita Blake: The Laughing Corpse 1-2 · Freak Force 1 · Chain Gang War 1 · Ewoks 9 · Cable 2 · The California Raisins 3-D 2 · Hardcore Station 1 · The Others 1 and Brute Force 1 · Amazing Spider-Man: Skating on Thin Ice 1 · Star Trek Voyager: Elite Force · Action Comics 592 · Action Comics 593 · Top 15 Comics I'll Never Review · 100th Episode · Nolan Ryan 1 · Transformers comics 4-5 · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive 1 and 2 · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive 3 and 4 · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive 5 · Spider-Man: The Greatest Responsibility · Action Comics 1 · Amazing Fantasy 15 · Detective Comics 27 · The X-Men 1 · Brute Force 2 · New Kids on the Block 4 · Marvel Team Up 127 · Santa Claus Conquers the Martians · Top 15 Screw-Ups of Atop the Fourth Wall
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Justice League: Cry for Justice 1-2 · Justice League: Cry for Justice 3-4 · Power Rangers Zeo 1 · Justice League: Cry for Justice 5-7 · Care Bears 13 · Superman: Distant Fires · Youngblood 3 · Doctor Who Classics 7 · Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four in... Brain Drain! · KISS Comics · Superman and Wonder Woman: Tandy Computer Whiz Kids · Spawn 1 · X-Force 1 · The Backstreet Project 1 · All-Star Batman and Robin 3 and 4 · Lady Gaga 1 · Star Trek: The Motion Picture 1-3 · The Godyssey 1 · Superman Meets the Quik Bunny · Ultimate Warrior's Workout · Ultimatum 1-2 · Ultimatum 3-4 · Ultimatum 5 · SCI-Spy 2 · Miller Time: Batman/Spawn · Gameboy 1 · Eminem and the Punisher 1 · Barbi Twin Adventures 1 · Rise of Arsenal 1-2 · Rise of Arsenal 3-4 · Comic Book Advertisements · Star Trek 2 (Gold Key) · PSA Hell: Captain America: Return of the Asthma Monster! · NBComics 1 · Mightily Murdered Power Ringers 1 · Kamandi at Earth's End 1 · US-1 2 · Twilight Zone 9 · Superman and the TRS-80 Whiz Kids: The Computers that Saved Metropolis! · Street Fighter 1 (Malibu) · Silent Hill: Paint It Black · Silent Hill: Among the Damned · Silent Hill: The Grinning Man · Spider-Man: Planet of the Symbiotes · Pokémon - The Electric Tale of Pikachu · All-Star Comics 8 · The Fantastic Four 1 · All-American Comics 16 · Captain America Comics 1 · Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan 1 · Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan 2 · Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan 3 · Top 15 Personal Favorite Jokes of AT4W
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2012:
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Marville 1 · Miller Time: Robocop vs. the Terminator 1 · Brute Force 3 · 15 Things That Are Wrong With Identity Crisis · New Guardians 1 · Gameboy 2 · Youngblood 4 · Star Trek III: The Search for Spock · Mr. T 1 (AP Comics) · Mr. T 2 · The Amazing Spider-Man and Captain America in Dr. Doom's Revenge! · The Invincible Four of Kung-Fu & Ninja 1 · Kamandi at Earth's End 2 · Black Web 1 · Transformers: Generation 2 1 · Captain Tax Time 1 · Superman 701 · Bloodstrike 1 · Marville 2 · The Amazing Spider-Man on Bullying Prevention 1 · The New Teen Titans Anti-Drug Giveaway 1 · Daredevil vs Vapora 1 · Batman: A Word to the Wise · Marvel Team-Up 74 · Blake's 7 2 · Battle for Bludhaven 1-2 · Battle for Bludhaven 3-4 · Battle for Bludhaven 5-6 · Sir Charles Barkley and the Referee Murders · Captain Electron 1 · Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home · 200th Episode · Rock 'N Roll 31 · Future Shock 1 · Catwoman: Guardian of Gotham 1 · Catwoman: Guardian of Gotham 2 · Psychoman 1 · Marville 3 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: The Answer to a Riddle · Batman: Jazz 1 · Starstream 1 · The Thing From Another World 1 · The Thing From Another World 2 · Spider-Man: Power and Responsibility · Bart Simpson's Treehouse of Horror 2 · Flash Comics 1 · Tales of Suspense 39 · The Brave and the Bold 54 · The Incredible Hulk 1 · Superman's Christmas Adventure · Archie Giant Series Magazine 452 · Teen Titans 13: A Swingin' Christmas Carol · Batman: Noel · The Next 15 Screw-Ups of Atop the Fourth Wall
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2013:
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Kamandi at Earth's End 3 · Raver 1 · Transformers 31 · Happy Days 2 · All-Star Batman and Robin 5 · Youngblood 5 · Star Wars 3-D 1 · Marville #4 · Titans Retrospective: Team History · Titans Retrospective: JLA/Titans: The Technis Imperative · Titans Retrospective: Titans 1-25 · Titans Retrospective: Titans 26-50 · Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster · Power Pachyderms 1 · Star Trek V: The Final Frontier · Dragnet 4 · Wild Thing 1 · Spider-Man 2099 1 · Punisher 2099 1 · Doom 2099 1 · Ravage 2099 1 · Comic Book Quickies 1 · Kamandi at Earth's End 4 · SCI-Spy 3 · Star Trek: The Next Generation/X-Men 1 · Mr. T and the T-Force 2 · Miller Time: All-Star Batman and Robin 6 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: A Deadly Choice · Battlestar Galactica: Journey's End 1 · Marville 5 · Miller Time: Tales to Offend 1 · The Culling: Teen Titans Annual 1 · The Culling: Superboy 9 · The Culling: Legion Lost 9 · The Culling: Teen Titans 9 · Plan 9 From Outer Space: 30 Years Later 1 · Brute Force 4 · Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country · SCI-Spy 4 · The Thing From Another World: Climate of Fear 1-2 · The Thing From Another World: Climate of Fear 3-4 · Spider-Man: Crossfire · 2001: A Space Odyssey 1 · Showcase 4 · Tales to Astonish 27 · Showcase 22 · Journey into Mystery 83 · The Punisher: Silent Night 1 · Solson Christmas Special featuring Samurai Santa 1 · Star Trek: The Next Generation 2 · Doctor Who Classic Comics 15 · The Next 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W
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2014:
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2015:
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Miller Time: All-Star Batman and Robin 9 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 2 · Trouble 1 · Comic Book Quickies 4 · PSA Hell: Energy and Safety with the Justice League · Youngblood 7 · ROMTROSPECTIVE: ROM Spaceknight 1-40 · ROMTROSPECTIVE: ROM Spaceknight 41-75 · The Star Wars 1 · Batman: Jazz 3 · Mr. T and the T-Force 3 · Big Bang Presents 3: Protoplasman! · Crimson 1 · Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines (RPG Game) · Titans: Scissors, Paper, Stone · PSA Hell: Batman: Shadow of the Bat 57 · Comic Book Quickies 5 · Avengers Assemble Featuring Captain Citrus 1 · Doctor Who/Star Trek: The Next Generation: Assimilation Squared · My Cage · The Punisher 60 · The Punisher 61 & 62 · Steam Wars · Ultimate Power 1-2 · Homestuck, Act 1 · Atomic Robo, Vol. 3 · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Superman · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Batman · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Wonder Woman · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating The Flash · Zyuranger Episodes 17-22 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: The Computer Trap · Trouble 2 · Pokémon Reburst, Chapter 1 · Green Lantern 23.1 · Team Youngblood 1 · US-1 5 · The Star Wars 2 · Power Man and Iron Fist 79 · Nightmares on Elm Street 1-2 · Nightmares on Elm Street 3-4 · Nightmares on Elm Street 5-6 · Spider-Man: Virtual Mortality · More Fun Comics 73 · Daredevil 1 · Action Comics 252 · Tales of Suspense 52 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 1 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 2 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 3 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 4 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 5 · Deadpool Bi-Annual 1 · Cho Dengeki Stryker · Zombies Christmas Carol 1-3 · Zombies Christmas Carol 4-5 · Another 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W
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2016:
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NFL SuperPro Special Edition 1 · Popeye: Borned to the Sea 1 · OnStar Batman Auto Show Special Edition 1 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 3 · The Star Wars 3 · Youngblood 8 · All-Star Batman and Robin 10 · Pokémon Adventures Ch. 1-2 · Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger Episodes 1-5 · Blue-Skying, Part 1: Blue Beetle Dan Garrett · Blue-Skying, Part 2: Blue Beetle Ted Kord · Blue-Skying, Part 3: Blue Beetle Jaime Reyes · Blue-Skying, Part 4: Blue Beetle Jaime Reyes New 52 · Star Trek Special: Flesh and Stone · Blackest Night 1-8 · Dart 1 · Batman: Shadow of the Bat 58 · The Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky · Ultimate Power 3 · Star Trek: The Next Generation 3 · Comic Book Quickies 6 · 400th Episode · 400th Episode: Part 2 · Superman vs. the Amazing Spider-Man · Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day 1 · Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day 2 · Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day 3 · 15 Things Wrong With Marvel's Civil War · Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 1 · The Minister of Chance · US-1 6 · Star Trek: Voyager 1 · Unsounded, Chapter 1 · Biggles and the Menace from Space · Batman and Robin: The Official Comic Adaptation · Superman and the TRS-80 Computer Whiz Kids: Victory by Computer · Star Trek/Green Lantern: The Spectrum War · My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic 27-28 · Yu-Gi-Oh! GX Ch. 1 · Pryde of the X-Men · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Paranoid 1 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Paranoid 2 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Paranoid 3 · Spider-Man: Cyberwar · The Real Ghostbusters in Ghostbusters II 1-3 · Strange Tales 110 · More Fun Comics 73: Aquaman · Tales of Suspense 57 · All-Star Comics 3 · My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic 2015 Holiday Special · Ghostbusters: Past, Present, and Future · Elvira's House of Mystery Special 1 · Another 15 Screw-Ups of AT4W
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2017:
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Digimon: Digital Monsters 1 · Phonogram: The Immaterial Girl 1-6 · Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1 · Trouble 3 · The Star Wars 4 · Spectacular Spider-Man Episode 1x10 - "Persona" · Youngblood 9 · The A-Team 2 · The Batman/Superman Movie: World's Finest · See You Next Mirror: Exiles Retrospective, Part 1 · See You Next Mirror: Exiles Retrospective, Part 2 · Reagan's Raiders 1 · Fist of the North Star, Ch. 1 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 4 · Iron Man: The Animated Series - The Wedding of Iron Man · Athena 3 · Batman: The Dark Knight 1-3 · The New Teen Titans Anti-Drug Giveaway 2 · Crisis on Infinite Earths · Secret Wars (1984) · The Infinity Gauntlet · Flashpoint · Babylon 5 1 · The Star Wars 5 · All-New Ghost Rider, Volume 2 · Robocop vs. the Terminator 2 · Superman vs. the Terminator 2 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: News By Computer Foils Kidnappers · Ultimate Power 4 · Delicious in Dungeon, Vol. 1 · Batman: Odyssey 1 · Asterix: The Legionary · Comic Book Quickies 7 · JoJo's Bizarre Adventures Episodes 1-4 (2012-2013 series) · Thunderbirds Are Go · Batman: The Official Movie Adaptation · Ultimate Iron Man Vol. 1 1-2 · My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic 11-12 · Stormwatch 0 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: The Beginning 1-2 · A Nightmare on Elm Street: Fearbook · New Line Cinema's Tales of Horror 1 · The Sensational Spider-Man 0 · Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash · Marvel Comics 1 · Brave and the Bold 28 · Kamen Rider Fourze Episodes 1-4 · Clive Barker's Hellraiser Dark Holiday Special · Sensation Comics 14: The Story of Fir Balsam · Steam Wars Holiday Special · Christmas with the Superheroes 2
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2018:
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My Top 15 Favorite Episodes of AT4W · Legion of Superheroes: The Great Darkness Saga · James Bond, Jr. 1 · JLA/Avengers · Homestuck, Act 2 · Isaac Asimov's I-Bots 1 · Thunderstrike 1 · Youngblood 10 · Badrock 1A · Event Comics Month II: Infinite Crisis · Event Comics Month II: Infinity War · Event Comics Month II: World War Hulk · Event Comics Month II: Final Crisis · Power Rangers Turbo vs. Beetleborgs Metallix 1 · Diesel 1 · Teen Titans: "Betrayal" and "Aftershock, Parts 1 and 2" · The Punisher: Purgatory · Comic Book Quickies 8 · 500th Episode · Dark Knight III: The Master Race 1-2 · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Green Lantern · The New Guardians 3 · US-1 7 · Nova Girls: Space 34-24-34 · Batman: Odyssey 2 · Star Wars 3-D 2 · Pokémon - The Electric Tale of Pikachu 3 · PSA Hell: Captain America Meets the Asthma Monster · Superman and Spider-Man · Amazing Cow Heroes 4: Cold Cuts · Ravage 2099 2 · Adventures of the Kool-Aid Man 2 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: Safeguarding the Environment · Mr. T and the T-Force 4 · Star Trek 2 (DC) · Star Trek (2009): The Official Motion Picture Adaptation · Star Trek: The Next Generation 4 · Star Trek 1 (Gold Key) · Silent Hill: Hunger · The Thing: The Northern Nightmare · Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash: The Nightmare Warriors · Spider-Man: Smoke and Mirrors · Hellraiser: Hell on Earth · Fantastic Four 52 · Marvel Comics 1 (The Human Torch) · The Incredible Hulk 181 · The New Mutants 98 · Batman Returns: The Official Comic Adaptation · The Punisher: Red X-Mas · Star Wars: The Force Awakens Comic Adaptation · Luke Cage, Hero for Hire 7
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2019:
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Yet Another 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 5 · Batman/Aliens 1 · Phineas and Ferb: Mission Marvel · Pokémon 15x19-20 "Cilan Takes Flight" and "An Amazing Aerial Battle" · Tomb Raider Vol. 3: Queen of Serpents · Little Victory: Chimera 1 · Youngblood 0 · Kickers, Inc. 1 · The Savage Dragon 1 · Darkwing Duck 1-4 · The California Raisins 3-D 5 · Hellstar Remina, Ch. 1-3 · Gallery of Horrors · Batman: The Dark Knight 16-17 · Tremors · Ultimate Power 5-6 · Batman Forever: The Official Comic Adaptation · Street Fighter: The Official Comic Adaptation · Catwoman: The Official Comic Adaptation · Dune: The Official Comic Adaptation · Superman IV: The Quest for Peace Movie Special · Justice is Silent: Cassandra Caintrospective, Part 1 · Justice is Silent: Cassandra Caintrospective, Part 2 · Justice is Silent: Cassandra Caintrospective, Part 3 · US-1 8 · Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: Community Action Program · Captain America Goes to War Against Drugs · Comic Book Swimsuit Issues · Batman 45-47: The Gift · Star Trek: The Next Generation 5 · The A-Team 3 · JoJo's Bizarre Adventures Episodes 5-9 · Trouble 4 · Franken Fran, Ch. 1 and 4 · Youngblood: Judgment Day · Teen Titans 27-28 · Clive Barker's Hellraiser 1 · Clive Barker's Hellraiser Summer Special · Clive Barker's Hellraiser Spring Slaughter · Spider-Man: The Exile Returns · Detective Comics 225 (Martian Manhunter) · Batman: Harley Quinn 1 · DC Comics Presents 26 · The Flash 123 · Evil Dead 2: A Merry Deadmite X-Mas · Transformers (UK) 145 · The All-New Batman: The Brave and the Bold 14 · Star Wars: The Last Jedi Comic Adaptation
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2020:
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Top 15 Dumbest Evil Plans of AT4W · Batman/Aliens 2 · Star vs. the Forces of Evil: Deep Trouble 1-4 · Megamind · Revolution · Superman vs. Muhammad Ali · Hellstar Remina, Ch. 4-6 · Youngblood: Strikefile 1 · Comic Book Quickies 9 · Black Panther, Vol. 4 1-6 · Batman: Odyssey 3 · Justice League/Mighty Morphin Power Rangers · The Champions, Vol. 3 1-4: Beat the Devil · Star Trek vs. Transformers · Athena 4 · Daredevil: Born Again · Action Comics 775 · Comic Book Quickies 10 · 600th Episode · Star Wars: The Phantom Menace Comic Adaptation · Star Wars: Attack of the Clones Comic Adaptation · Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith Comic Adaptation · Star Wars: Rogue One Comic Adaptation · DC Challenge! 1 · Kyoryu Sentai Zyurangers Episodes 40-43 · Trouble 5 · Dan Dare: Voyage to Venus · Superman 358 · Zero Hour: Crisis in Time · House of M · Secret Empire · Heroes in Crisis · Animax 1 · Ninjutsu 1-2 · Green Goblin 1-2, 4, 8, 12-13 · US-1 9 · Emergency! 1 · Mr. T and the T-Force 5 · Pinhead 1-3 · Pinhead 4-6 · Pinhead vs. Marshal Law · Spider-Man: Web of Life · Marvel Super-Heroes 12 (Captain Marvel) · The Flash 110 · The Amazing Spider-Man 129 · Awesome Comics Holiday Special · Transformers (UK) 41 · Solo: A Star Wars Story Comic Adaptation
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2021:
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Yet Another 15 Screw-Ups of AT4W · Star Trek Book and Record Set: Dinosaur Planet · DC Challenge! 2 · The Mighty Heroes 1 · Justice League 1x01-3: Secret Origins · The Star Wars 6 · The King of Braves GaoGaiGar Ep. 1-4 · Youngblood: Strikefile 2 · Pokémon 15×01-02: "Enter Elesa, Electrifying Gym Leader" & "Dazzling the Nimbasa Gym" · Stanley and his Monster 1-4 · Marvel Than Meets the Eye: The Transformers 1-40 · Marvel Than Meets the Eye: Transformers 41-80 · Marvel Than Meets the Eye: Generation 2 and Regeneration One · Star Trek 9 (Gold Key) · Star Trek/Legion of Superheroes · Mystery Science Theater 3000 1 · Batman: The Dark Knight Returns · Ultimate Power 7-8 · Batman: The Dark Knight 23.4 · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Aquaman · Sword Interval: Flashback Arc · PSA Hell: The Amazing Spider-Man: Riot at Robotworld · Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (Ultimate Edition) · Transformers/Ghostbusters: Ghosts of Cybertron · The New Guardians 4 · Codename: Ninja 1 · Batman: Hush · Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger Ep. 15-16 · Mr. T and the T-Force 6 · Doom’s IV 1 · Batman and Elmer Fudd & Catwoman and Sylvester and Tweety · Batman: Odyssey 4 · The Dresden Files: Storm Front, Vol. 1 · US-1 10 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 6 · DC Challenge! 3 · Marvel Super Special 1: KISS · The Ring, Vol. 1 · The Ring, Vol. 2 · Spider-Man: Web of Death · Detective Comics 359 · The X-Men 4 · Batman 1 · Spider-Man Holiday Special 1995 · The Adventures of Chrissie Claus 1 · Christmas Quickies 1 · Still Another 15 Missed Opportunities of AT4W
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2022:
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Ultimate Power 9 · The Adventures of Superboy 3x05-06 and 4x07-08 · Batman: The Killing Joke Adaptation · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating the JLA · Chew: Poyo Character Focus · Youngblood: Strikefile 3 · Doctor Who: Logopolis · Armageddon 2001 · Secret Invasion · Civil War II · Dark Nights: Metal · The Star Wars 7 · Sonic the Hedgehog: Tangle and Whisper · Star Trek: The Next Generation/X-Men: Planet X · Stargate SG-1: P.O.W. · Man of Steel · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 7 · Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger Episodes 17-21 · US-1 11 · X-Men Green · Spider-Man: Maximum Carnage · DC Challenge! 4 · Comic Book Quickies 11 · 700th Episode · Ken Penders' The Lost Ones 1 · Star Wars Infinities: A New Hope · Transformers: Deviations · Legion of Superheroes 0 and Legionnaires 0 · Mr. T and the T-Force 7 · The Ring, Vol. 3: Spiral · The Ring, Vol. 4: Birthday · Spider-Man: Funeral for an Octopus · Christmas Quickies 2 · Batman 27: A Christmas Peril · Mr. T and Emmanuel Lewis in A Christmas Dream · Top 15 Goofiest Superheroes of Atop the Fourth Wall
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2023:
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Star Wars: A New Hope Comic Adaptation · Marvelman Family's Finest 1 · Superman vs. Aliens 1 · Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney · Hellblazer: Dangerous Habits · Youngblood: Strikefile 4 · What Dreams May Come, Part 1: The Sandman 1-20 · What Dreams May Come, Part 2: The Sandman 21-40 · What Dreams May Come, Part 3: The Sandman 41-60 · What Dreams May Come, Part 4: The Sandman 61-75 · Animax 2 · The Dome: Ground Zero · Action Comics 1 (Non-Superman Stories) · Transformers (UK) 132-134 · Just Imagine Stan Lee Creating Robin · Mr. T and the T-Force 8 · The Dresden Files: Storm Front, Vol. 2: Maelstrom · Captain Marvel: The Last Avenger · E-Robot, Ch. 1 · Overwatch: Legacy and Old Soldiers · Green Lantern: Emerald Twilight · Back to the Future: Who is Marty McFly? · Super Soldier 1 · Legends of the Dark Claw 1 · Spider-Boy 1 · Assassins 1 · DC Challenge! 5 · US-1 12 · The Star Wars 8 · Godzilla: Kingdom of Monsters 8 · The Ring, Vol 0: Birthday · Sadako at the End of the World · Spider-Man: The Mark of Kaine · Sadako-San and Sadako-Chan · Doctor Who: Remembrance of the Daleks · Doctor Who: The Klepton Parasites · Doctor Who: The Chimes of Midnight · Yu-Gi-Oh: Capsule Monsters Ep. 1-3 · Klaus 1-7
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2024:
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Still Another 15 Mistakes of AT4W · Batman vs. the Predator 1 · Ben 10 Ep. 1×01, 09, 13 · Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger Ep. 14, 22-24 · Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back Comic Adaptation · Sonic/Mega Man: Worlds Collide, Act 1
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Specials:
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AT4W 2009 Trailer · Linkara's Take on Watchmen · Watchmen Review · Theme Song Contest · The Spoony Experiment: Warrior #1 · Theme Song Contest Winner! · Blackest Night · Silent Hill: Dying Inside Trailer · Silent Hill Alternate Endings · AT4W & Spoony: Experiment Warrior 2-3 · October 2010 Trailer · Silent Hill: Dead/Alive Review Alternate Endings · The Live Show! · AT4W Story Recap · October 2011 Trailer · Return of AT4W Live! · Revenge of the AT4W Live! · Southland Tales · Curse of AT4W Live · House of AT4W Live! · Ghost of AT4W LIVE! · October 2012 Trailers · Bride of AT4W Live! · Son of AT4W Live! · Night of AT4W Live! · Day of AT4W Live! · Dawn of AT4W Live! · Land of AT4W Live! · Diary and Survival of AT4W Live! · Power of AT4W Live! · Midnight of AT4W Live! · Planet of AT4W LIVE! · Genesis of AT4W LIVE! · 300th Episode Livestream Recordings · Destiny of AT4W LIVE! · Resurrection of AT4W LIVE! · Revelation of AT4W Live! · Remembrance of AT4W LIVE! · The New 52 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 1 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 2 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 3 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 4 · Atop the Fourth Wall: The Movie, Part 5
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